Denzel

Hear, hear!!!

KILL THE *******!!!!

Is that quick enough?

Maybe you got confused with spanking your own monkey, but don't let on about it.

Onanism. Disgusting.

Well folks, I don't know about you, but I'm feeling particularly festive; it's not long until Santa will be popping down my chimney and (hopefully) leaving me a bumper crop of quality gifts.

But this year I haven't asked for a Lamborghini, and instead have opted for a more esoteric item, ie a mandolin (for chopping vegetables with, I haven't joined The Waterboys).

What gifts have the good folks of Bedlingtonshire requested then?

Whats with this "older folks' bit Swallnala. As I remember, you are still in the prime of life. Not like some of us.

Now I am old, and have the decrepitude to prove it. CK is obviously catching up with me, and as for Denzel, thats anyones guess, anywhere between six and sixty I would think!

So give it a rest, and get back to the wry and witty Swallnala we all remember and enjoy so much!

Joe Rooney

Oi, I heard that!

Parade. Rained on.

And what answers should I give?

Well that's hardly my fault is it?!

Sir, this is a family establishment.

you've seen the upstairs in the Lion more than most.

Something about older barmaids with you Mr Denzil,

friggin GILF hunter

MILF actually.

'How man tha me fuggin mazzies how'.

Oi, Dazza has his finger on the pulse of 'Yoof Culchah'; he's merely following in the footsteps of Janet Street Porter and Normski.

That's a fantastic piece of trivia, personally speaking I'd like to thank you for sharing it with us.

Yes, and your point is?

well, apparently their used to be a christmas tree with lights in in the market place, till someones theiving sister pinched them....

no names mentioned mind...

also, apparently their is a mobile display planned each night down the front street...

or maybe thats another guy getting arrested for drunk and disorderly because he decided to stagger home to save the taxi fare and tripped on the big pot hole on the main street thats been there for years.

getting arrested....£80

a meal and flowers as an apology to the wife...£80

realising your hands are wedged in your jeans pockets BEFORE you trip......PRICELESS!

but thats a story for another thread!

WTF?!

Ah, 'Stranger on the Shore'.........

Well wear another Lacoste jumper.

And 'belter', as i believe you hip kidz would say.

'Pov'?

Hell yeah! It's hapnin' bro'!

Go to the hospital and get it checked properly.

Who needs NHS Direct?!

swearing?

i had the (mis)fortune of having a grandad who told me a few stories, one of which was the source of the 'brass monkey' story, which i diddnt believe for a minute.

but it seams thru further investigation he was right, to a point!

so, if anyone wants to know the real source for the saying 'freeze the balls off a brass monkey' let me know and all will be revieled!

Howay then tell us!

anyone got any idea how much the lease is going for?

someone told me £3,000 but that cant be true...

they would have to pay someone much more than that to get that place back on its feet!

me personally, i've never been with anyone in that pub

Me neither.

I wish I could get my bins emptied.

Well miracles can happen at Xmas.

Flats at the Red Lion - how cool is that!