Recently, the abject state of 'heavy metal' music has been brought to my attention. Last Wednesday I watched a programme on BBC2 concerning Norwegian 'black metal' music. Quite simply, it was crap; imagine GWAR, but taking it seriously. And these kids were lapping it up; human sacrifices, pentagrams, the !*!@# lot. On Friday I watched a bit of the Kerrang Awards. It got worse. A lamentable bunch of US college growlers operating under the monicker of 'Trivium' scooped the Best Band award, and it was painful. Middle class US college kids growling away (and lots of Beavis & Butthead style hand gestures, which I thought had died out) about skateboards, and the smart bird in 10th grade who called him a long-haired nerd, or somesuch nonsense. So come on you metal kids, do something about it.