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Seperated At Birth.


Malcolm Robinson

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I was so disappointed when I heard the news that Paolo was leaving. Hoping they would have kept him there until xmas, or at least another 4 weeks - Liverpool, Man U, Swansea then NUFC.

But in the grand design of thinks I suppose another failed manager will be chosen. Pity Mark Hughes isn't available, he could have taken them further down.

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Our intrepid photographer having fought across the vast swathes of wasteland along the rank banks of that polluted brook, the so-called 'River' Weir, finally reached their target ... that vile nest of inbreds. Embedded with the forces of good our man braved the threat of infection and disease to bring us photos of the final victory over the hordes of darkness.

The enemy HQ before and after:

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A series of photos showing the former leaders office:

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The former leader making his escape:

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Our intrepid photographer having fought across the vast swathes of wasteland along the rank banks of that polluted brook, the so-called 'River' Weir, finally reached their target ... that vile nest of inbreds. Embedded with the forces of good our man braved the threat of infection and disease to bring us photos of the final victory over the hordes of darkness.

The enemy HQ before and after:

post-894-0-19761300-1380026989_thumb.jpgpost-894-0-72545300-1380027019_thumb.jpg

A series of photos showing the former leaders office:

post-894-0-62177200-1380027140_thumb.jpgpost-894-0-13330000-1380027141_thumb.jpg

post-894-0-55073600-1380027141_thumb.jpgpost-894-0-06097100-1380027142_thumb.jpg

post-894-0-60466800-1380027142_thumb.jpg

The former leader making his escape:

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Thank you Symptoms. An email has been made and the pics on their way to NUFC faithful - swings and round-a-bouts, enjoy it whilst it lasts.
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That centre forward was a little fella ... that borrowed jacket of his you've got on would just look daft on him. Just shows what a cheepo outfit those from that dark place were ... a job lot of XXXL blazers from Man-at-C&A.

This is being written at half-time ... Everton 3 Toon 0 (watching it on Sky) so I've got to get my scraps of comfort from somewhere.

Edited by Symptoms
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Rumours from Allied HQ that a small unit of the Forces of Darkness, formally based in that dank cellar above a disused colliery, have been spotted trying to re-group under the leadership of a fella from a small South American country. Uruguay was a former bolt-hole for the escaping former bosses of the earlier evil fascist regime of the 30s and 40s.

The small enemy force, made-up mainly of old men and boys, have been charged by their new leader to defend "until the death", their ruined bunker of plight. Our brave agent managed to smuggle-out a couple of photos taken at this meeting which show the speech ...

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  • 2 weeks later...

Drawing close is the final battle of freedom from the savage effects of the evil being done to all right-thinking folks by the Forces of Darkness holed-up in the ruined Bunker of Plight. Our brave undercover agent continues to smuggle out vital intelligence on the planning being done by the enemy in advance of what The Forces of Good hope will be the decisive battle this weekend.

The 'tinpot' South American dictator Gus Poison leading a training session:

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The mackem brigade's forwardline during their training session this morning:

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Further news from the regional conflict ...

The advance Glorious Toonfan V1 Brigade seen crossing the majestic Tyne on the Shield's Ferry enroute to the Front:

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Our brave boys shown in the First Class lounge onboard the ferry:

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The Magnificent Toonfan XII Brigade leaving the Central Station on one of the many special trains heading towards the Front:

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Edited by Symptoms
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Reports of a most disturbing nature have been sent to Allied Tooncommand Center from one of our brave agents operating deep behind the enemy frontline. A crack unit of mercenaries have been see driving north from their base on the banks of that smelly Tees-swamp; this notorious chemical warefare unit, the Smoggiemackem Troop, are suspected of moving their illegal horde of weapons of mass-distruction (WMD) towards the Bunker of Plight salient. Supreme Allied Commander 'Percy' Pardew has stated that if this vile group manage to deploy their WMD's against his forces it could delay the ultimate outcome of the campaign until May next year, he has however warned his forces of this new danger and reminded them that it was used earlier during the infamous Battle of Gallowgate.

The Smoggiemackem Troop pictured moving North:

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Meanwhile, our Free French Regiment was pictured with our Supreme Allied Commander 'Percy' Pardew at their 'jump-off' point:

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The Free French Mid-field General was seen practicing taking long-range shots in anticipation of the battle tomorrow:

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News of a most disturbing nature has reached us from the Front; the enemy has indeed committed war crimes against the Forces of Good. As we speak the War Crimes Commission is gathering evidence which shows a range of vile methods used by the Wearjunta before and during the battle for the Bunker of Plight salient. Some of these reports are indeed shocking. The kidnapping of key members of Toonbrigade unit commanders and sending them on Death Flights over the North Sea - this terror method was developed in certain South American countries. The indiscrimated use of local zombie hordes deployed to infect our healthy boys. Finally, probably the biggest crime of the day was the outrageous claim made by the mackemdeputy-minister of information.

Ian McDonald, the Allies spokesman, breaking the news of the events from the 'dark place':

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mackemzombies:

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mackemdeputy-minister of information:

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A further bulletin has just been released by Ian McDonald that a number of Fifth Columnists are being rounded-up in the Northumberland homelands, especially in Bedlington. No details yet, but we hope to bring you images of this important work later.

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Sketchy reports are emerging from the mackemgang's Southern Front that they were defeated by a ragbag unit led by Private 'Geordie' Bruce.

Photo of an Allied soldier reading a copy of today's The Football Pink - note the headline:

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Photo taken in Hull of the mackemgang's kitmen cleaning their uniform rags before boarding the team bus (in the background) for the journey back to the Bunker of Plight:

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Today, at HQ Supreme Commander Percy Pardew is seen watching from viewing platform one of his battalions score an easy victory over the vile cockneyhordes. The mackemboss GusPoison was a former member of this southern gang:

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  • 2 months later...

Further pictures just in from the Vatican Square ... these show one of the doves released by the mackemBossGodBotherer being pursued by the black and white birds of goodness.  Later reports tell of an eviscerated carcass seen crawling back to it's dilapidated cree on the banks of the polluted mackemburn.

 

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